Happy 2009

Happy 2009. May the new year bring more happiness and prosperity to all of us. Amin!

There is nothing permanent except change

His Majesty's Titah for the new Hijriah is all too clear.  We need to embrace change.  There are a lot of things that scare me  but our widespread apathy and complacency are amongst the ones that would scare me the most. The most common I am hearing is either "dont worry we have a lot of oil" or either this one.. "oh yeah, why worry, we have a lot of foreign reserves".  I was reading one forummer in Brudirect who said that Brunei is a heaven on earth with all the things that we have.  This nonchalant attitude really scares me

There are a few things that I am very certain and these include,

1.  Our oil is not an infinite resource. It will run out.

2.  The world will find a more efficient, clean and safe alternative source of energy.

3.  Our portfolio investments overseas will not guarantee jobs at home.

4.  The civil service cannot continue to expand and provide jobs for the locals.

5.  Inflation will continue to hit us.

If we need to embrace change, I would say it has to begin with our laid back attitude as if our current prosperity is a carte blanche from above.

stinky salad?

When my missus and I went shopping this afternoon, we stopped by at the food stalls to have an early dinner. Again I am sure this is another case of lost in translation.  But I am very sure a lot of people would think twice of ordering this dish. Unless of course you have the gut to stomach it :-)

For pet's sake, any name will do but this

We have a lil hamster and we named him tabby.  I suppose it is the most benign of all names for a pet. But would you call your pet with naughty sounding monicker like the one here? I am sure if your pets could talk back to you they would say "for pet's sake, any name will do but not this one" hehehehh

Brunei needs strong cancer awareness too

I got a call from my brother at 6 am this morning breaking the sad news that my first cousin on my mum's side had just passed away.  He died of brain cancer.  The saddest part was that he was about my age and his 3 children are still very small. His other older siblings abang yusop and abang johan also died of the same type of cancer in their early 40s not so long ago.  They were all very close to me as we live in the same village and one of their siblings abang ramli happens to be my eldest adopted brother. I came to the parents' house as early as I could to catch the last glimpse of him but unfortunately he was already shrouded in the white cloth as was normally the case for muslim's funeral. The parents were visibly distraught especially the mum. Who would bear the thought of losing her own three sons all in their very young age and over the same ailment? 

In my previous blogs, I did write a few entries about my mum being diagnosed with stomach cancer. She is now recovering well after her surgery. We are thankful to Allah that we manage to detect hers earlier. We continue to pray to Allah that there wont be any relapse.  There are many types of cancer and some can be very difficult to detect as the symptoms only show when it is already too late a stage (stage 4).  One scary thought is that cancer can be genetic. In fact, I now know that on my mum's side there is  preponderance of that risk. Apart from my first cousins I mentioned who just passed away, my mum's first cousin died of brain tumor including his own son some years ago too. My other first cousin whose mum is my mum's youngest sister also died of the same disease at a very young age. Strangely enough they first showed signs of schizophrenia or in malay "gimbaran" when they caught the ailment but nobody suspected brain tumor. As typical in malay belief, we like to say "kana buat" but this cannot be the case. 

I often tell my siblings that our risks to cancer is very high. That is why I have been asking my older and younger brother to quit smoking which always fall on deaf ears.  I know tobacco smoke has been linked to many forms of cancer especially lung cancer as it contains over fifty known carcinogens.  Although genetics may play a role but a change to a healthier lifestyle may greatly reduce that risk of getting cancer.

To my cousin, may Allah bless your soul. Al- fatiha

my two other girls in my life (my eldest daughters that is) dragged me to the Mall over the weekend to watch 'twilight'. it was their second time watching it and I was wondering what the hype was the movie all about. I could have sworn that I fell asleep watching! nevermind it was a vampire movie but it was a movie about "vegetarian" vampires and one of them fell in love with a mortal girl.  There was only one reason why my two daughters loved the movie. The lead actor was probably every teenage girls' heartthrob to die for and my two little princesses no exception. 

The movie was an adaptation of a romance novel of the same name which  was a best seller in every nook and cranny and you have probably heard it too unless of course you got incarcerated in Guantanamo bay during that period. My eldest daughter had read the book many months earlier and  she was the one who kept reminding me to call the cinemas if they were going to show it in town and this was like last august! anyway, my advice to any parents planning to watch that movie, unless you have a teenage daughter (or in my case two of them!) that puts a gun to you head or just to reminisce the puppy love you once had, please dont bother.

Learning to accept criticisms in really big strides

My entry tonite is about that part of me as a public servant. Yes servant to the public....

I cant believe my luck. I was complaining of chest pain this afternoon and went to a&e thinking that I had asthma attack. instead the doctor wanted to put me under 24 hour observation just to make sure that I do not have any heart condition!! Now I am stuck in this hospital ward. They say that my oxygen level in my blood is low that is why I experience shortness in breath. So they will have to perform further tests. Could this just be my luck?! This is my first time I have to stay overnight at RIPAS. I didnt want to make such a big fuss about it.  I told my missus not to tell my parents or anyone for otherwise they would just go absolute bonkers panicking. Anyway, I was really embarrassed as I bumped into a few people that recognised me. "is the stress really getting on you pengiran?" "eh, I just saw you on TV, stress kah heheh?" "maybe you had too much tv exposure heheh?" were just amongst the few comments that I had. I have long accepted these snide remarks as part of the occupational hazards as I know as a public figure I will never be able to please everyone. There will be people who will belittle us and there will be people who will encourage us.  For as long as the people who belittle us are in the minority, I always say to my officers, we would be on the right track. Because I keep reminding my officers, we are not in this job to be popular.  There would be people especially those who have been investigated by us and those who have been brought by us to face justice and those who are bent on corruption who would never be with us. in fact the Bureau would be their all-time sworn enemy. I took the advice of the people at the United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime  (UNODC) of which we work very closely and got our technical assistance from.  As they said our awareness campaign against corruption and our NO to corruption should be louder than anyone else. In fact, strong awareness and prevention strategies are required in the UN Convention Against Corruption the treaty that Brunei is now bound to comply. These are the two key strategies that we adopt. the other being strong law enforcement.  The UNODC now looks at us as one model of strong prevention and education program. We were actually very proud when they sent a representative to Brunei to look closely how we implement this program.  I suppose when it comes to dealing with the public criticism  you will never win but just simply to keep on doing in what you think is best. I am encouraged by the positive notes and words from members of the public who have been very supportive of our efforts.  I keep telling my officers to just focus on the positive words of encouragement.  Of course we need to listen to any dissenting voice if it meant well or if it meant to help us improve. Unfortunately, there would be one or two voices who would be complete rejectionists. These are the people that would normally bark the loudest.  I keep telling my officers that we should not see these as mere challenges but rather opportunities. Opportunities for us to understand why there are dissenting voices because we can also learn from them. 

Happy International Anti Corruption Day

Hello world! May I just wish happy anti-corruption day which falls on today worldwide. Your NO to corruption count. Please visit my official weblog at http://anticorruptionwatch.blogspot.com and our official website at www.bmr.gov.bn.

I really do need a break

How do you make everyone including your friends and families understand that what you are doing is for the sake of this country and the future generation and yet stop short from sounding too corny and idealistic especially to the cynics and to those who would not be able to understand it? Yesterday both my eldest son and my youngest daughter asked me if I am taking some time off from work and would take them abroad. I told them "no sayang, babah has to work" My son cheekily suggested that I should just quit my job.  They started to make comparison that in my previous job, I was able to take time off and bring them abroad like to Singapore or Malaysia even for a short break during the school season.  It is very difficult to tell them that now things are a little bit different. I have more responsibilities and I am more accountable to a lot more people. Even my mum started to make comparison. She came to my house yesterday and began to "sindir" me by saying that my amit (her older sister) has no problem in seeing her children as they would usually spend every weekend together at her home. I just wanted to make her understand that now because of the bigger responsibility, I have to be a public servant first in many occasions and being my wife's husband, my kids' dad and my mum's son would have to fight for second place.  For the last few days, I virtually had no understanding of what day and date it was as I actually had to work on friday and sunday, night and day.  For that part of me as a husband, dad and son, yes I do need a break but I cannot simply abdicate my responsibility as a servant to the public at least not when the public is expecting to see results. I have a mission and I have a mandate. I just wished everyone around me understand me that.

The funniest christmas joke

In the spirit of this holiday season, I thought I would like to share this really funny christmas joke.   A young man called Chris from London wanted to buy a Christmas present for his new girlfriend. They hadn't been seeing each other for very long and she lived in Scotland . Chris consulted with his sister and decided, after careful consideration, that a pair of good quality gloves would strike the right note... not too romantic and not too personal. Off he went with his sister to Harrods and they selected a dainty pair of fur lined quality leather gloves. His sister bought a pair of sexy knickers for herself at the same time. Harrods had a free gift wrap offer but the assistant mixed up the two items, the sister got the gloves and Chris unknowingly got the knickers. Good old Chris sent off his gift wrapped present in a parcel with the following letter. Dear Maggie, I chose these because I've noticed that you are not wearing any when we go out in the evenings. If it had not been for my sister I would have chosen the long ones with buttons, but she wears shorter ones (which are easier to remove). These are a very delicate shade, but the lady I bought them from showed me the pair she had been wearing for the past three weeks and I hardly noticed any marks. I had her try yours on for me and she looked really smart in them even though they were a little bit tight on her. She also said that they rub against her ring which helps keep it clean. In fact she hasn't needed to wash it since she began wearing them. I wish I was there to put them on for you the first time, as no doubt many other hands will touch them before I have a chance to see you again. When you take them off remember to blow into them a little bit because they will be naturally a little damp from wearing. Just imagine how many times my lips will kiss them during the coming year. I hope you will wear them for me on our next date. All my love, Chris P.S. My mum tells me that the latest style is to wear them folded down with a little bit of fur showing.

need a toothbrush anyone?

When my missus and I went for our short break in Bangkok the other day, one of the things we loved doing was going shopping at the many open night markets scattered around Bangkok. I am very sure that you have come across with those t-shirts put up on display with funny and almost vulgar wordings written on them. But what caught our attention most was one particular t-shirt that says "oral-me" with a very suggestive caricature of a couple. we just bust our gut laughing at how funny the t-shirt was. Of course I wouldn't dare to be caught in the public with that kind of t-shirt here. since this is my personal blog about my life with my family, I need obviously avoid any form of vulgarities lest my daughter would quickly jump and brand my jokes in her own word too "risque"...But I couldn't help and publish this photo which I took recently when I went shopping at one supermarket in town.  I just couldnt believe my eyes when I saw that brand "oral-me" does actually exist!

Well done alai Syafiq!

The PSR results were out and this is the first time the MOE fully jumped on the bandwagon of embracing the "e"  in releasing the exams results for the primary 6. My hats off to MOE! The e-results were released via the sms by simply subscribing to the telcos DST or B-mobile.  My eldest son got A's in all his subjects .  Well done alai Syafiq. You proved to your sister that you could also do the same. Babah is really so proud of you sayang.

Leadership

I thought I should share “10 Thoughts about Leadership” which I stumbled across from Jon Gordon’s blog

1. People follow the leader first and the leader’s vision second - It doesn’t matter if the leader shares a powerful vision, if the leader is not someone who people will follow the vision will never be realized. As a leader, who you are makes a difference. The most important message you can share is yourself.
2. Trust is the force that connects people to the leader and his/her vision - Without trust there is a huge gap between the leader and the vision. Without trust people will stay off the bus. However if people trust the leader they will hop on the bus with the leader and help move the bus forward towards the vision.
3. Leadership is not just about what you do but what you can inspire, encourage and empower others to do.
4. A leader brings out the best within others by sharing the best within themselves.
5. Just because you’re driving the bus doesn’t mean you have the right to run people over - Abraham Lincoln said “Most anyone can stand adversity, but to test a man’s character give him power.” The more power you are granted the more it is your responsibility to serve, develop and empower others. When you help them grow they’ll help you grow.
6. “Rules without Relationship Leads to Rebellion” - Andy Stanley said this and it’s one of my favorite quotes. As a leader you can have all the rules you want but if you don’t invest in your people and develop a relationship with them they will rebel. This applies amazingly to children as well. It’s all about relationships.
7. Lead with optimism, enthusiasm and positive energy, guard against pessimism and weed out negativity.
8. Great Leaders know they don’t have all the answers. Rather they build a team of people who either know the answers or will find them.
9. Leaders inspire and teach their people to focus on solutions, not complaints. (The No Complaining Rule)
10. Great leaders know that success is a process not a destination - One of my heroes John Wooden, the legendary UCLA basketball coach, never focused on winning. He knew that winning was the by product of great leadership, teamwork, focus, commitment and execution of the fundamentals. As a leader focus on your people and process, not the outcome.

 

Asthma Joke

I am still trying to recover from this wheezing and puffing. Funnily enough I managed to finish 2 sets of badminton game after work today albeit rather badly. Though I lost both games, I quite enjoyed sweating out as I really needed to lose that fat.  But being asthmatic is no joke so I made sure I had two puffs of the ventolin inhaler just before the game. At least that probably helped me from collapsing on the floor.

After work, I managed to bring the family to visit my parents as my lil niece, alai dibah who happens to turn three today was celebrating her bday at my parents' house. So happy sweet 3 year old to you alai dibah. My mum looked healthy after the surgery and that was very pleasing to see. Dad with his usual grumpiness couldnt seem to get off his old habit of starting his negative conversation about mum. 

Anyway, I thought I could end today's entry by sharing this asthma joke which was related to me by a friend who likes to poke fun on my current malady:

Matthew sets up Andrew to go on a blind date with a friend of his. But Andrew is a little worried about going out with someone he has never seen before.“What do I do if she’s ugly?” says Andrew, “I’ll be stuck with her all night.” “Don’t worry.” Matthew says. “Just go up to her door and meet her first. If you like what you see, then everything goes as planned. If you don’t, just shout Aaauuuggghhh! and fake an asthma attack.”So that night, Andrew knocks at the girl’s door, and when she comes out he is awe-struck at how beautiful and sexy she is. Andrew’s about to speak when the girl suddenly shouts, “Aaauuuggghhh!”

Another lost in translation

Today, I went for a nebulizer treatment. I had one of the worst asthma attacks that morning. For a moment I thought I was going to die in my sleep. I was awaken in the middle of a deep sleep when I felt as if someone smothered me. I was frantically gasping for air and coughing incessantly. Despite that horrifying ordeal, I managed to look at the funny side of things. see, the portable nebulizer machine has this funny label which says: 

"For intra-hospital infection and mormal condition in use, please replase bacteria filter with new ones every patient and/or every 8 hours"[sic]  its probably made in china :-)

Syafiq and his Rubik's Cube

My 11 year old eldest son syafiq is such a show off.  He can solve the Rubik's cube in less than 2 minutes and his time is improving.  His best time now is 1 min 4 seconds.  I can never solve the cube with all the colours on the same side with a perfect match and I can tell you I have been struggling to get it right for as long as I could remember.  I remember when it was such a craze more than 25 odd years ago, my school friends and I would try to outwit each other to solve the "magic cube". I never did and I never will. Now I have my son the poseur who tells me, solving the cube is such a piece of cake! I hate him...

Happy b'day alai H

yesterday was my lil sister's birthday and I just want to say happy birthday dear alai. As I am writing this entry, we are about to go to her dinner treat. I am still not very sure of what to get her. So I thought I might as well just give her some pocket money. Anyway, lai, happy bday, should I tell the whole world how old you are now?

(last updated 10 Nov 19:18 pm with some pics uploaded)

p.s. sorry lai everyone knows how old you are now by counting the number of candles on that cake :-)

Thank You America

I am truly elated to know that Obama has won the US election, the
first black president. To me, it is the next big thing since Tiger
Woods..Thank you America. You have shown to the world that we can seek
change without resorting to violence. You have shown to the world that
change can be done through the ballot box and not through bloodshed.
Thank you and thank you..

A good career dad: is this a misnomer?

A friend of mine sent me this email as an advice. I have read it before but I thought I should publish it here as it beckons a very deep message especially to workaholics with young kids.  

A man came home from work late, tired and irritated, to find his 5-year old son waiting for him at the door.
SON: 'Daddy, may I ask you a question?'
DAD: 'Yeah sure, what is it son?' replied the man.
SON: 'Daddy, how much do you make an hour?'
DAD: 'That's none of your business. Why do you ask such a thing?' the man said angrily.
SON: 'I just want to know. Please tell me, how much do you make an hour?'
DAD: 'If you must know, I make $50 an hour.'
SON: 'Oh,' the little boy replied, with his head down.
SON: 'Daddy, may I please borrow $25?'
The father was furious, 'If the only reason you asked that is so you can borrow some money to buy a silly toy or some other nonsense, then you march yourself straight to your room and go to bed. Think about why you are being so selfish. I don't work hard everyday for such childish frivolities. '
The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door.
The man sat down and started to get even angrier about the little boy's questions. How dare he ask such questions only to get some money?
After about an hour or so, the man had calmed down, and started to think:
Maybe there was something he really needed to buy with that $25.00 and he really didn't ask for money very often. The man went to the door of the little boy's room and opened the door.
'Are you asleep, son?' He asked.
'No daddy, I'm awake,' replied the boy.
'I've been thinking, maybe I was too hard on you earlier' said the man. 'It's been a long day and I took out my aggravation on you. Here's the $25 you asked for.'
The little boy sat straight up, smiling. 'Oh, thank you daddy!' he yelled. Then, reaching under his pillow he pulled out some crumpled up bills.
The man saw that the boy already had money, started to get angry again.
The little boy slowly counted out his money, and then looked up at his father.
'Why do you want more money if you already have some?' the father grumbled.
'Because I didn't have enough, but now I do,' the little boy replied.
'Daddy, I have $50 now. Can I buy an hour of your time? Please come home early tomorrow. I would like to have dinner with you.'
The father was crushed. He put his arms around his little son, and he begged for his forgiveness.
It's just a short reminder to all of you working so hard in life. We should not let time slip through our fingers without having spent some time with those who really matter to us, those close to our hearts. Do remember to share that $50 worth of your time with someone you love.
If we die tomorrow, the company or the department that we are working for could easily replace us in a matter of hours. But the family & friends we leave behind will feel the loss for the rest of their lives. 

I have 6 kids. The eldest is 15 and the youngest is now 3. There are many many times that I missed their birthdays, their parent-teacher meetings at their schools, their sports days and many more just because I had to work or attend meetings abroad. Its always my missus who would be their dad and mum at the same time. I know they would want their dad to be around when they won prizes or performed their class singings at the end of the final school term. I tried not to miss these but there were many times work had to come first.  There are times when I looked at my eldest 2 daughters and wondered if I had spent enough time with them when they were just little kids growing up.  Like any guilt-trodden dad, I am now fighting to gain back those lost years but I do realise, they were only kids once.  I now have to accept the fact that my eldest daughters are no longer small kids. they no longer want to be with you all the time. They want to go out with their own friends and peers. Gone were the days when they want to  "ikut jalan" to almost everywhere that I went, even to fill up the car fuel tank.  

All is not lost. I now make sure that I give time for my younger kids.  I would make sure that I spend at least an hour a day with them playing frisbee, kaki tiga or basketball or fishing at the back of my house. Fridays or sundays will always be spent with them on the swimming pool at the polo club or a night out at the movies if there are suitable shows on. I now feel that my kids appreciate my presence more as they always look jubilant as soon as I arrive home from work. Just last night my little 3 year old son haziq who is still clingy with both of us came to our bed and squeezed himself in the middle. I asked him why would he want to sleep with mum and dad. And he gave me the simplest of answers.

"sebab haziq sayang babah sama babu"

Questions that bother me?

Since the day I was at law school, the following questions have been bothering me.

Can we survive as a nation without:

1. Oil?

2. Gas?

3. Subsidies?

4. Personal income tax?

I once posed this question to my university law professor who was an expert on constitutional and administrative law on the most effective solution for a government to increase governance and reduce the risks of abuse of power by public servants.  He gave me a crudely simple answer but I thought it did and even until now makes some sense, reduce the size of the public sector and their powers, privatise their services and let the private sector deliver public services.  It does make sense. The less power that a person has, the less opportunity for him to abuse it.  The less services that public officer needs to deliver, the less opportunity for him to "rent out" his authority for his personal gain.  That is why to me, corporatization  and subsequently privatisation of public services do make sense.

Bangkok escape

I thought of publishing some pics of our short Bangkok break. 

Ambuyat and durian galore

I had probably made more than one entries on durian that I would have assumed by now everyone knows that I am a durian aficionado. Another addiction that I have is with ambuyat, the sticky gooey stuff from the sago plant that somehow made it through the local cuisine served commercially at some local restaurants here.

Hello, can you be more inconsiderate than this?

My first day of a real break from work cant get any better. I am now at the Royal Skies lounge with my mrs waiting for a flight to Bangkok. I am taking time off with her.  She has never been there and I promise her  we will do a bit of shopping therapy especially down at their famous flea and night markets.

we are simply lazying on the nice sofas reading the papers quietly only to listen to the occasional flight announcements. But somehow the soothing sound of water cascading the water fountain is now spoilt by this inconsiderate man who talks loudly on the phone.  He continues opening his big mouth ignoring other passengers around him. How inconsiderate can you get than this? I saw many passengers just shook their heads in disbelief. Yo mister! are you telling everyone that you are so important kah? you are a very selfish, inconsiderate and total moron!!

Sick as a cat

I have been feeling very sick for the last few days (you would say "sick as a dog" but as Muslim I dont like using this idiom. No offence intended against the purity of the english idiom but to be likened to a dog is to me not appropriate) Anyway, I had a very bad case of food poisoning.   I had to go to the A&E two days in a row where they had to put me on water drips as I was losing a lot of body fluid. I also had a huge dosage of antibiotics directly injected through the water tube as well as a good amount of anti-gastric medication as usually antibiotics would give me a very bad acid reflux. Although I am feeling much better now, the stomach cramps are still stubbornly there every odd hour or so. This is probably the longest case of food poisoning I have had.  One was in Bali and the other one was in London.  In Bali it was a bad big mac and London a bad indian chicken tikka. The doctor gave me 2 days medical leave. I took that opportunity to stay in bed doing my reading. I have these few books that I bought during my previous traveling as a globetrotting international lawyer that I havent quite finished reading yet, A short history of nearly everything by Bill Bryson, the clash of civilization by samuel huntington and a non-fiction The Afghan by Frederick forsyth just to name a few. The clash of civilisation is actually an old thesis written in 1993 by a Harvard professor but however after 9/11 it somehow generated a lot more debate. It is a scary thought that conflicts between civilizations would dominate the future of world politics and world order.  Are we returning to period of the crusades? I certainly hope not but some of the prognosis of this Harvard professor has already some tell tale signs.  Islamiphobia in Europe and the USA suddenly on the increase.  Islam suddenly became seen as a third world religion. Although I do not wish to defend the actions of the muslims who kill in the name of religion but I do raise my hope that the world order should also be on the dictate of inter-faith understandings. 

Kosovo is a state, no?

The other day at my Raya open house I had one interesting visitor.  She came from Kosovo.  I told her, I was honoured to receive her as this was my first time meeting a kosovar (I am not sure if that is a correct term). I wanted to learn about her “country” as I have heard so much about the conflicts in the former states that made up the federation of Yugoslavia.  Now Kosovo is struggling to gain recognition of her self-declared independence.  She asked me on my personal thoughts about it.  I told her personally I fully support the declaration as the world has recognised Montenegro as an independent state and after all the former states that formed Yugoslavia had been independent since the war of 1991. so now why Kosovo is singled out as having no right to the very principle of self determination? I asked.  I told her that there were 3 basic criteria of statehood, a defined territory, an effective Government and a determined population.  She then questioned me why then the OIC countries were not supportive of Kosovo independence. I could sense her frustration with the muslim countries as strangely Kosovo being mostly muslims different from the Serbs did not somehow get enough support from the OIC countries in their struggle to gain international recognition of statehood.  I somehow thought she had a point. Most EU countries now recognise its statehood and so as the USA. It is I thought different from Taiwan.  To my recollection, Taiwan had never made an official attempt to self-declare its independence  and the Taiwanese and the Mainland chinese are in effect chinese. So Kosovo is a different proposition altogether. Since 1999 it had been under the UN backed administration. So why is it that the OIC is not supportive of this struggle?

I guess if you wished to to know about the history behind Kosovo move, the following is the extract that I got from wikipedia:

When, Slobodan MILOSEVIC became president of the Serbian Republic and his ultranationalist calls for Serbian domination led to the violent breakup of Yugoslavia along ethnic lines. In 1991, Croatia, Slovenia, and Macedonia declared independence, followed by Bosnia in 1992. The remaining republics of Serbia and Montenegro declared a new Federal Republic of Yugoslavia (FRY) in April 1992 and under MILOSEVIC's leadership, Serbia led various military campaigns to unite ethnic Serbs in neighboring republics into a "Greater Serbia." These actions led to Yugoslavia being ousted from the UN in 1992, but Serbia continued its - ultimately unsuccessful - campaign until signing the Dayton Peace Accords in 1995. MILOSEVIC kept tight control over Serbia and eventually became president of the FRY in 1997. In 1998, an ethnic Albanian insurgency in the formerly autonomous Serbian province of Kosovo provoked a Serbian counterinsurgency campaign that resulted in massacres and massive expulsions of ethnic Albanians living in Kosovo. The MILOSEVIC government's rejection of a proposed international settlement led to NATO's bombing of Serbia in the spring of 1999 and to the eventual withdrawal of Serbian military and police forces from Kosovo in June 1999. UNSC Resolution 1244 in June 1999 authorized the stationing of a NATO-led force (KFOR) in Kosovo to provide a safe and secure environment for the region's ethnic communities, created a UN interim Administration Mission in Kosovo (UNMIK) to foster self-governing institutions, and reserved the issue of Kosovo's final status for an unspecified date in the future. In 2001, UNMIK promulgated a constitutional framework that allowed Kosovo to establish institutions of self-government and led to Kosovo's first parliamentary election. FRY elections in September 2000 led to the ouster of MILOSEVIC and installed Vojislav KOSTUNICA as president. A broad coalition of democratic reformist parties known as DOS (the Democratic Opposition of Serbia) was subsequently elected to parliament in December 2000 and took control of the government. DOS arrested MILOSEVIC in 2001 and allowed for him to be tried in The Hague for crimes against humanity. (MILOSEVIC died in March 2006 before the completion of his trial.) In 2001, the country's suspension from the UN was lifted. In 2003, the FRY became Serbia and Montenegro, a loose federation of the two republics with a federal level parliament. Widespread violence predominantly targeting ethnic Serbs in Kosovo in March 2004 caused the international community to open negotiations on the future status of Kosovo in January 2006. In May 2006, Montenegro invoked its right to secede from the federation and - following a successful referendum - it declared itself an independent nation on 3 June 2006. Two days later, Serbia declared that it was the successor state to the union of Serbia and Montenegro. A new Serbian constitution was approved in October 2006 and adopted the following month. After 15 months of inconclusive negotiations mediated by the UN and four months of further inconclusive negotiations mediated by the US, EU, and Russia, on 17 February 2008, the UNMIK-administered province of Kosovo declared itself independent of Serbia.

1st Day Raya

1st day of raya is  always the day I am always looking forward.  Not only its a day that the whole family gather around at my parents' house for a reunion of sort, I also get the opportunity to get invited to the palace to meet and greet hari raya wishes to our beloved sultan and his family in a rather joyous settings with all the good food and the best chocolates and cakes you can ever imagine.  I always look forward to this because I could sample the fresh lobsters and huge alaskan crabs and many more. yummy..but as I always I couldnt eat that much as I would normally spend more time giving hari raya greetings to everyone. And the one thing I am sure the guests are looking forward to is probably the Raya souvenir. This year, I have to say the Raya souvenir is really pretty. I am told the palace souvenir was designed wholly inhouse. wow! my hats off to them. Inside it, there is a fruit cake laced with sweet white chocolate coating all produced by the Istana kitchen, Hyatt.

Wishing Mum for a speedy recovery

Mum underwent surgery at around 845 am this morning. She only came out of the operation theatre at around 3 pm.  I went there as early as a I could to catch a glimpse of mum before she went for the surgery. tears ran down my cheeks  and said to mum, "if God willing you would be okay". On the other hand, I wasnt ok. that morning I already had stomach cramps. so I went to the A&E and asked for a diagnosis. I had food poisoning. I wasnt exactly sure what I ate the night before. I had a feeling it was the lassi at this Indian Restaurant as it tasted so bad that I told the waiter to take it away. the stomach cramps were so excruciating that I can still feel them even as I am writing this blog which is like more than 8 hours now. the doctor gave me a jab on my butt and my little brother poked fun at me by saying I had been sodomized! I was given two days MC. Anyway, I thought of giving mum a visit but I am not too sure if I can even get off this bed. 

Praying for Babu

Waking up on Friday morning after learning the shocking news that your mum has cancer is not something that I am looking forward to. The sad news has somehow not sunk in yet. There were just too many questions that remained unanswered. why did this thing happen? am I going to lose her? is this curable? what can I do? why is the full diagnosis not released yet? the feeling of helplessness crept in constantly in my head. when the gastro specialist broke the news, I just broke down in tears inconsolable..I really couldnt accept the news. I was just like this little child begging to the doctor to help my mum get better. “is there a cure?” I asked. The doctor said if the cancer is still at an early stage, yes there is hope by removing the cancerous part of her stomach but if it has already spread to other organs then things could become complicated and that was why they needed a full diagnosis by putting her on a CT scan. I was simply frantically calling everyone that I knew at RIPAS to help babu be put on the CT scan on a priority basis. Some were helpful some were none. So I sought help by pleading my mum’s case. I told them the actual endoscopy was done many weeks earlier and now that the specialist confirmed that she has cancer, the least the hospital could do was to put her on a priority list for a full CT scan. I was thankful that my good friend Hj M and Dato S, who is now a permanent secretary. They had helped me a lot to get to the right people. So thank you to both of you sir. I was really upset with some of the nurses at the hospital where my babu was warded. She was admitted at the ward for her high blood sugar level. But earlier in the weeks, she was already seeing the ENT & gastro specialists as she complained of heart burn. She had an endoscopy done on her and the earlier result showed she had stomach ulcers. When I told them that she was supposed to have a second review at the specialist centre, the nurses told me that we couldnt bring her there as she was now already admitted in the ward and she should be in their care and there would be doctors on duty to attend to her so they told me. They kept telling me that mum only had stomach ulcers and her blood sugar level was high and she had gone to see the specialist that morning. But I told them that that the appointment card stated that she had her review at 2 pm that afternoon and the least they could do was to check with the specialist centre if this was true. Not convinced with their explanation, I went to the specialist centre with my wife and little sister and went to talk the specialist myself. He was very gentle and helpful. True enough, there was an appointment for my mum’s review and true enough it was more than just a mere stomach ulcers. I was devastated. There was a mixed feeling of anger and helplessness. I was angry with the nurses for trivializing the situation. I was feeling helpless as I didnt know exactly what to expect.

(written 8 am 10 October)

The good news, mum had her CT Scan done and another good news was also that the result showed her cancer is still at an early stage. Now we all know this is curable. Alhamdullilah. But there is still the lingering question on what best options available to her. She is diabetic and her blood sugar level is still very high. I sought advice from Dr S who is a cancer expert. Whether she would go for a chemo theraphy and surgery to remove the cancerous part would depend on her health condition. so he told me that mum has to be healthy, so the first priority is to get her blood sugar level down to normal. I pray to Allah the Merciful, give my mum the strength. please give her the will to live. Amin.

Little Haziq and his antics

My youngest 3 year old son lil haziq has this funny habit when he gets upset with me.  Instead of throwing tantrums he would just sit still and start to grimace making funny faces with his eye brows almost joined together.  I would usually just laugh at him and he would get more upset with me as he would know I wasnt taking him seriously.  The other day, he wanted to go to jungle gym, a pay-as-you-enter playground down at Kiulap, in town. I told him that we couldnt go there as often he would like to as its very expensive. So he started to get upset. But what was so hilarious he simply lied flat on the floor with his face down  refusing to budge. He just lied there completely motionless and refused to talk to me.  So I took a few shots of his antics.  My wife and I would usually in our quite moments together share some of these funny antics of all our kids and the littlest one is by far the most hilarious.  I keep reminding my wife that our life would really be empty without them and we should consider ourselves lucky of having 6 wonderful kids with all their different amusing characters. 

Dont "dis" the accountability especially if you are a public servant!

One ramadan a couple of nights ago, I had a very interesting “sahur-talk” at a restaurant in town with a couple of friends and one of them happened to be a very senior public servant. The talk centered on the current topsy-turvy  baffling  Malaysian politics and the uncertainty surrounding the BN led government and on the rising support of the PKR led Anwar. The “sahur table” somewhat became our little speakers’ corner where everyone on the table was exercising their right to be heard. What led me to become more engrossed in the conversation was at the way my senior friend commented that the MPs whether in the Government or in the opposition could if they wanted vote with their conscience when it comes to passing legislation. so at the end of the day he continued to say, it didnt really matter if the Government had a slim or huge majority in parliament as MPs are free to vote with their conscience. Whilst I didnt disagree with what he said, I told him that in any westminster style parliamentary system there is such a person called the party whip whose job it is to ensure that party members toe the party line.  Further more, there is also public accountability because in a Government of the people, which was made by and for the people, there is such a thing as party manifesto which is like a moral contract that binds between those who get elected and those who elected the MPs into office in the first place. I told my little audience that If the people elected you into office because of your promise to wipe out corruption then you better make sure you deliver your promises for otherwise people will lose faith in you should you fail to deliver your promise. Or if you promised to cut down taxes in your party manifesto but somehow passed legislation to increase the taxes, you can be sure you wont get reelected come the next election.   This is I think the current debacle faced by Pak Lah, his basic failures to deliver what he had promised. But I am not here to write about just Msian politics or the conundrum faced by Pak Lah.  I am more interested to the very notion of public accountability in the public service as I am since I took over the new post very much committed to championing this cause.  Public accountability is not and cannot just be an illusory principle..

I now know that statistically experts have said that only 2 to 3 % of abuse of power gets reported either in the public or private sector.  Abuse of power can include, misuse of funds, fraud, theft, corruption, office pilfering or misuse of office or corporate assets.  One report that I read before by a well known accounting firm put it that office pilfering like taking home the office stationaries like pens, papers or even using the office phones for overseas private calls or the photocopy machines to make copies for the exam papers of the employees’ children are very commonplace and actually have put a burden to the operational expenditure (OPEX) of the organisations. This is only the lower end of the scale when it comes to abuse of power. The bigger ones that often are really left unnoticed is the abuse of authority or in the case of public servant the abuse of his public office for personal gain, the most common of which is market collusion where the employee uses his authority by pre-selecting vendors and awarding them to any tenders or procurement contracts done by the organisation. In return the employee takes a commission for every contract award given to his pre-selected vendors. This is blatant corruption to its very core. Many experts have actually estimated that this form of abuse of power can cost between 5 to 10 %  of the total cost of the contract award. So, I can only imagine that if the Government were to allocate $1 billion dollars earmarked for the development budget, a figure as high as $100 million dollars can simply be squandered by all the Mister 10 percents! Sadly many see this as an accepted business cost.  I once had a conversation with another senior public servant who said that in business, corruption is part of the business costs which are often disguised in many forms such as entertainment or under such heading like consultancy fees. Whilst I am not disputing that that practice does happen, it is not something that we should tolerate. More so if the corruption affects the use of public funds, the costs would somehow be consumed by the Government through inflated contract pricing.  The one thing that we need to understand is that whatever “business costs” incurred by the vendor, we can be sure that they will be taken in as a sunken costs should the vendor gets awarded with the contract or tender. So at the end, it is the Government that suffers in terms of the opportunity costs.  Just imagine how much the Government can do with the $100 million that is pilfered through corruption or the criminal breach of trust? for a start we can build one school for $5-15 million or a mosque for $5 million.  {this is not a complete article..I will complete it after this Hari Raya honeymoon is over..to be continued}

The accidental New layout

What have I done? I was tinkering on the theme of my blog by downloading some free xml code that I stumbled upon on the web. It looks cool but some of the original features like the Archives have gone missing! now I dont know how to get back to the original one. 

Job Application

My friend sent me an email with this attachment . she convinced me that this was an original job application of a 75 year old man. I dont know if I should believe her but it sure is so hilarious!

Eid Mubarak or as we say it here "selamat hari raya aidil fitri"

Raya is coming to Brunei in either 2 or 3 days' time depending whether or not the moon is sighted or not. The moon sighting will be done tomorrow just before dusk. so if the moon is sighted, it means Eid will be celebrated on wednesday. Otherwise it will fall on Thursday.  I would certainly hope that Eid to fall on Thursday as this would mean that we would have a longer holiday as Friday which is already a holiday for public servants would be replaced with Saturday as the public holiday.

A Stercus accidit's perspective of America today

As a Bruneian thousands of miles away from Uncle Sam, doubtless, I cannot understand the cultural forces behind american politics.  But please don’t get me wrong, I have been to the USA and I love the country and I love the people (well not exactly everyone). I love the way democracy works in that country which shows that we dont have to resort to violence or anarchy like what happen in most other countries to exercise your freedom of thought and your voice.  But as an outsider here is what I see the current situation in the US and its people. 

Most Americans do not travel outside the country. In fact they see that the USA is the world. They can call the “world series” like the baseball world series even though no other countries are participating. Many of them think that only America is effective and that the rest of the world should unquestioningly follow her lead. To them America is, without question, the best country in the world, despite that these people very often have never even visited another country. I find that most of them are shockingly ignorant of the world and because of this they are very gullible. when their leaders say something negative of other countries, they take everything "as is". When Bush said that Saddam was building a nuke bomb and had WMD, most of them believed him.

Many Americans think only in the yin and yang pattern.  Black or white, good or evil, right or wrong.  you are “with me or against me”.   Too them, an action is either right or wrong, you are either a liberal or a conservative.  But the world, on the other hand, does not necessarily fit neatly into that pattern. Switzerland or even my country always prefer to be neutral. You can be a conservative on certain issues and sometimes you can be liberal about certain issues and sometimes you can be neutral on certain issues.  It cannot be that if I differ from you, I am against you.

The US government is surprisingly very open to corruption but somehow it appears to be legal by way of campaign financing, lobbying, and “ I scratch your back and you scratch mine” cronyism.  The jewish lobby for instance is so powerful and none of the Dems or GOP dare enough to make political snipes on Israel for fear of upsetting the fund flows. So we cannot see them as a neutral broker for the peace process in the middle east.

Your President used outright lies to pass legislations to curtail your freedom.  He used the 911 fear and the al-Qaeda fear factor as a smokescreen to pass a series of Acts increasing executive power, to deny access to ever increasing amounts of information about his government and to forbid examination of controversial policies having nothing to do with the war. 

I see McCain, the GOP presidential candidate as an opportunist who became wealthy by having an affair and subsequently marrying a woman from a very wealthy family after his 1st wife had an accident.  He is no war hero. He got caught by the Viet-cong for not taking orders from his superior.  I think his 5 years in the “vietnam hilton” made him an impulsive war mongering hawk simply to get even with everyone .  This is a man who has an inexperienced running mate who used her beauty as a purely political ploy.  This is a man, during an election campaign, refused media interviews on the flimsiest of excuses and now he wanted to postpone the debate. (I’m still waiting for the news of his appearance at the time of writing this blog)

So to me if you voted for this man, you are basically will be giving Bush a third term in office. and pray tell..if this happens I say God please help us!

Back to the gym

Today just after Isya, I made for the first time in nearly 2 months my pilgrimage to the Fitness Zone- my gym in town owned by the famous Taiwan based Bruneian Wu Chun. With a few pounds gained, hitting to the gym was in itself a real effort for me as the “mood” is still not there yet.

After doing my routine stretching and warmup - I thought the first thing I would do was taking a dip into the lap pool and spend 25 minutes cardio exercise with my favourite free style strokes.  So I hit to the pool’s changing room located at the lower level of gym. At 845 pm, I was all alone so I had quick mirror check. I could have sworn that my love handle have grown in size! 

After 30 minutes in the water, I was not yet certain whether this was worth the effort as I was really gasping for air. I was really huffing and puffing in the water.   Honestly, the fasting month has not really helped kept my weight down.  

Another bomb blast in Islamabad Pakistan

there was another bomb blast in Pakistan and possibly 50 people were killed and the number of fatalities  could increase.  This is utterly a stupid act. These stupid militants are bringing shame to Islam. Shame on you!!  There is no wonder that in the west there is a growing fear of islam. Who can blame them? whilst its true that not all muslims are terrorist but its also true that most terrorists now are muslims.

I often wondered which is a better country, one that is governed and influenced heavily by theological dogma or one that is governed by a democratic regime.  If we compare India and Pakistan, both countries came out from the shackles of colonialism at about the same time but look at India and Pakistan.  India as the biggest democracy in the world is now seen as another China with an annual 2 digit economic growth.  But look at where Pakistan is. we hear killings almost on a daily basis. political killings and killings in the name of Islam. The muslims are also killing amongst themselves between the sunni majority and the Shia minority. corruption is rampant. high unemployment. at the rate they are going, the country is spiraling downward.  It is obvious that India will be the first to achieve a developed nation status.

What are big sisters for?

Did I tell you, I had a surprise call last tuesday from my big sis?  she is now residing in Kuching Sarawak, East Malaysia. "hai lai, are you in Brunei? I would be in Brunei for a short transit esok. Why dont we get together with everyone for sungkai lai? before I even paused for an answer, she went on " You belanja (treat) lai ah?. Dont tell everyone that I am around as I want to give them a little surprise" I actually even forgot with what I wanted to say as my big sis has this habit of talking continuously only to pause when she wants to take a breathe. I was actually delighted to hear from her as I had not called her for awhile and I actually had not seen her for months. She did come to Brunei for a short visit but that was like 6 months ago if I recall correctly. so I told her "Ok tu kaka tini, its on me. we can book at Ilotus as they really serve good buffet for sungkai".."eh why not at the airport?" she asked casually "you know lai, I have to catch a flight at 8 pm". 

 I thought the airport restaurant is also good but at $28 per person and for 15 people would be too tight on my wallet. Not that I wanted to sound so stingy, I had been giving a few dinner and sahur treats to a couple of friends for the last 3 or 4 nights and raya is coming. So I told her, "the Ilotus is really good kaka as I was there 2 nights ago. what you can do is to check in early and get your boarding pass so that you wont have to rush to the airport afterwards". and the good thing of being siblings, we can always be frank to each other "besides, the airport restaurant is expensivelah kaka tini, if we get everyone together, my pocket is not that deep enough at the moment, you know lah raya is coming" she nodded "ok tu lai"..well that was the conversation.

My big sis showing off her new residence in Kuching

so when the day came, unfortunately my other sis could not make it as her son was celebrating his birthday. My dad couldnt come as well as he had his usual dialysis and my youngest brother cancelled at the last minute and his excuse was that he had to attend our nephew's bday. what a dissapoinment! so it was only half the crowd than expected. it turned out to be a good 1 1/2 hr spent with my big sis.

Best Headlines of all time

           Crack Found on Governor's Daughter

           [Imagine that!]

           Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says

           [No, really?]

           Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers

           [Now that's taking things a bit far!]

           Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?

           [Not if I wipe thoroughly!]

           Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over

           [What a guy!]

           Miners Refuse to Work after Death

           [No-good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-sos!]

           Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant

           [See if that works any better than a fair trial!]

           War Dims Hope for Peace

           [I can see where it might have that effect!]

           If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile

           [You think?]

           Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures

           [Who would have thought!]

           (London) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide

           [They may be on to something!]

           Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges

           [You mean there's something stronger than duct

           tape?]

           Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge

           [he probably IS the battery charge!]

           New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group

           [Weren't they fat enough?!]

           Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft

           [That's what he gets for eating those beans!]

           Kids Make Nutritious Snacks

           [Taste like chicken?]

           Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half

           [Chainsaw Massacre all over again!]

           Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors

           [Boy, are they tall!]

Ramadan Karim

to all muslims and non-muslims alike throughout the world, my best wishes to all of you during this holy month of ramadan.  May God grant you health and prosperity now and in the years ahead. May this month be filled with good health and happiness for you, your family and friends.  Let us renew our pledge to God Almighty to fill this world with love and kindness.  I wish you a blessed Ramadan mubarak....

to all non-muslims, you may be wondering what ramadan is all about. here is some basic understanding on what it really means to us, which I copied courtesy of eHow.com:

Ramadan is the holiest of the four holy months in the Islamic lunar calendar. Once the sighting of the new moon is authenticated from a reliable source, several customs and stringent practices begin as part of the deep rooted Ramadan tradition. At the commencement of Ramadan, Muslims wish each other saying, "Ramadan Mubarak" which means "Blessed Ramadan."

Step2

Ramadan WishesAs instructed in the holy Quran, fasting during this holy month is one of the most significant observances. It is mandatory for all physically mature and healthy Muslims, to abstain from all kinds of foods, beverages, intoxicating substances or any kind of sexual intimacy from dawn to sunset. It is the expression of sincere and personal worship through which Muslims seek divine blessings and achieve a higher plane of spiritual consciousness. That is why the spiritual approach of the fast orders to refrain from greed, slander, false oath or even gossip. Undesirable sights or sounds are to be avoided, during this sacred month. Piety of heart and mind is needed to be achieved through the practice of fasting as it redirects the heart from trivial, mundane pursuits, towards almighty Allah. Spiritual introspection, prayer, doing good deeds for humanity and spending time with friends, family and acquaintances is the spirit of Ramadan.

Step3

Happy Ramadan WishesOne of the long standing traditions of Ramadan is to consume one light meal just before the sun rises, which is known as Suhoor. It is considered a blessed meal. Though it is not mandatory for the Muslims to eat suhoor but it is highly recommended and the intention of continuing the fast all night long without eating suhoor is strongly discouraged. The tradition to take Suhoor, underlines the inherent intention of the fast, which is to show your obedience to Allah and not to show your physical strength. Hence taking suhoor provides the energy necessary to endure the day long fasting.

Step4

A similar tradition, to have a light meal just after the sun sets is called Iftar. Nowadays the radio or television announce the exact time of Iftar. But the old tradition was to listen to the call from the mosque’s minarets to know when Iftar begins. It is usually customary to have dates along with water as Prophet Mohammad also broke his fast eating the same. Some believers also have a light soup made of wheat boiled in meat broth.

Step5

Ramadan is an occasion to spend time with friends, family and well wishers. The breaking of the fast is followed by friends and families greeting each other Ramadan Mubarak and sharing an evening meal, consisting of meat, rice and vegetables.

Step6

Another aspect of this holy occasion of Ramadan is that the last odd numbered nights of the month is considered the “Laylat ul-Qadr”, which in English means, “Night of The Power” or “Night of The Destiny”. It is the most sacred night of the holiest month as it is believed that on this very day angel Gabriel began to disclose the Quran to the Prophet Mohammad. But the exact date is not known to anyone. Nevertheless, praying and seeking religious blessings on this night is considered thousand times powerful than any other night.

Step7

During the entire moth of Ramadan, Muslims are recommended to read the entire Quran. For the convenience of reading the Quran within the thirty days of Ramadan, the 114 chapters of it have been divided in to thirty equal parts.

An important and ancient tradition of Ramadan is charity. After the Ramadan ends Muslims donate a calculated amount, which is enough to feed one poor person in that region for one day. This custom is known as Fitra and it reminds the suffering of the poor, hungry and impoverished. This is also the occasion to pay Zakhat, or the annual alms which is the 2.5% of the entire assets. Zakat is donated to the poor and needy people of the locality as well.